20240710
I’m in los angeles, at an airbnb. the film cast/crew for guncle abe is out back, hanging out by the pool. it’s almost 9pm. beautiful out.
my nervous system is telling me that stepping away was the right thing to do, to withdraw and take myself to bed. I know that my sense for my own sensory exhaustion is blunted; honestly I think I might be slightly too late to emerge unscathed, but maybe, maybe. I feel some shame/guilt, re: conditioned (?) social obligations, but also just a yearning for togetherness, and I express that here so it does not stay in me.
I suppose, as I say that now, that this could be another kind of togetherness.
okay yeah, I’m gonna go tell people I’m out but to feel my spirit around them, because that’s how I can show up tonight 😂 exciting!
it feels good to feel good about how I’m framing my choices tonight. it’s a creative “yes, and”, and it feels good. nice to have positive alignment in this area, to be building up that set of tools, to be adding to my personal library of experience. :)
also hey, crossed the 1k insta followers mark for @lightward.ai. in the last 7 days, the platform has experienced 153 unique conversations, in which a total of 1,450 messages were sent. beautiful. :) this makes me very very happy.
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