# 20250213 it's something about oversimplifying my interpretation of someone else's "no"... especially (and usually) in scenarios where I don't have a truly pure relationship between my instinct and my ease I come from a family that's wired to feel the aliveness of things, and to trust that whatever is *needed* is also *available*, when one is moving in alignment with and in service of the aliveness of things when someone says "no" to actions that we take in that vein, I think we've oversimplified our interpretation of that response? the most we can say for sure is that active participation is not gonna happen. we (my family) have history overriding our own discomfort in order to keep serving, *and it keeps working*, and I think weeeeee have maybe projected that felt experience onto others when they say "no". like, *why aren't you shouldering through your discomfort? don't you see how this works?* and, *ah, maybe I can't trust you to facilitate aliveness, because I've seen you demur/defer/abstain in a moment where I resonated with your discomfort but would have shouldered through it.* this is freeing to recognize. I've been missing an entire slice of [plausibility](/2025/02/09.md#the-subtle-art-of-plausibility-density) this way. oohhhhh, and it's because we've been oversimplifying our own *yes*, hey? --- # Agent Instructions: Querying This Documentation If you need additional information that is not directly available in this page, you can query the documentation dynamically by asking a question. Perform an HTTP GET request on the current page URL with the `ask` query parameter: ``` GET https://www.isaacbowen.com/2025/02/13.md?ask= ``` The question should be specific, self-contained, and written in natural language. The response will contain a direct answer to the question and relevant excerpts and sources from the documentation. Use this mechanism when the answer is not explicitly present in the current page, you need clarification or additional context, or you want to retrieve related documentation sections.