# 20260227

Integration day, maybe? My parents stayed with us last night (they made it in time to join me/Abe/Ian/Karen/Andy in seeing Annie Rauwerda's "Depths Of Wikipedia" show), and this morning we breakfasted and caught up re: Spirit Hill Crossing and Zielke Haus, and health insurance for Ethan and Amanda, and financial ownership of things.

Abe laid out our current financial experiment for them, for shared reference, over breakfast. The openness, it feels *so* good. So good. All structural components in clear view, with clean joins.

That was like a 90min conversation before noon, which is much more than I usually load up into working memory at that time.

I get the feeling that my body is experiencing something like a rest after a one-rep max lift. The conversation was actually *incredibly* easy, the details all just unspooled and the result was easily harmonious, no tangles. I feel like witnessing it be that clean, that easy, that free of tension, was itself the lift I've been training for. The one-rep max lift of self-plus-family-plus-marriage-plus-vocation: train correctly for it ("correctly" is a test to pass, not a path to match), and it's weightless when it happens, but you might be staggered just from the happening, from something like astonishment.

Brain-rest today, lol.

***

I slept for a few hours, just woke up, it's currently 4:46pm. Last bit of my dream was me casting my eyes around the room, having moved between rooms and tried my headphones (paired to someone else's phone and they were mid-convo lol), apparently exhausting my options for finding a space in the area that was friendly to my system in light and sound and structure. To myself, in my head, I went, "okay! okay. what can I do for myself here?", and then I woke up. Perhaps that *was* the best coping move? :D

***

I feel good. Like there's understanding and intelligent flow happening between me and not-me, between that-which-is-within-my-skin and that-which-is-without.